Thank God we have “Google” around to be our social conscience (I’m being very sarcastic by the way).   

(Please refer to my two previous blogs regarding our friends at “Google,” dated September 24, 2018 and September 17, 2018 for a little background.)

When I “google” “#METOO,” why do I get a program error?

When I “goggle” “sexual misconduct at Google,” why does it come back saying, “Did you mean: sexual misconduct at the GOP?”

A couple of weeks ago, The (failing) New York Times detailed the alleged misconduct of senior executives, as well as Google’s admission that it fired 48 people for sexual harassment over the past two years.

What’s going on over there!?  And who are these people?

Did they hire Harvey Weinstein while we weren’t looking?  How about Matt Lauer?

Do they have a hiring pipeline of Penn State alumnae?  Michigan State?  Former US Olympic Gymnastic coaches?

Google employees abandoned their desks and staged a 10 minute walkout, at Google office all over the world, in protest of the company’s handling of sexual misconduct allegations.

The campaign has been dubbed “The Google Walkout For Real Change,” and the first walkouts occurred at their offices in Singapore, Zürich, Switzerland and London.

Google is headquartered in “whacky” California, of course, and has 78 offices in the US and around the world (Do they really need that many offices to run a search engine?).

Anyway, campaign organizers have said they were “disgusted” by the details of The New York Times report.  They said “it is an example of a culture of complicity, dismissiveness, and support for perpetrators in the face of sexual harassment, misconduct, and abuse of power.”

These are pretty harsh and damning allegations!

Not at Google!  Say it ain’t so!

Not at such a forward thinking, thoughtful, liberal, gender and racially considerate company like Google!

Google has always been considered “cutting edge” regarding company culture and work environment.  Google was considered revolutionary for maximizing a flexible working atmosphere for improved productivity.  Rubber exercise balls used for office chairs, cubicle free offices, wooden doors held by saw horses acting as desks, multicolored lava lamps and dogs roaming the halls led to a “comfortable” work place.  This environment proved to be highly effective in increasing the creative output of its employees.

Google hired a “company chef,” who introduced the staff to health conscious and energy boosting recipes. There were weekly roller hockey games in the parking lot and weekly “TGIF meetings.”  The free and informal atmosphere supposedly led to an easier exchange of ideas.

The free and informal atmosphere has apparently led to more than just an easier exchange of ideas!

Google employees have a list of five demands for change.  Here they are in the campaign’s own words:

An end to Forced Arbitration in cases of harassment and discrimination for all current and future employees.

A commitment to end pay and opportunity inequity.

A publicly disclosed sexual harassment transparency report.

A clear, uniform, globally inclusive process for reporting sexual misconduct safely and anonymously.

Elevate the Chief Diversity Officer to answer directly to the CEO and make recommendations directly to the Board of Directors.  Appoint an Employee Rep to the Board.

I’m really surprised by these demands…, not because they are so “over the top,” but because they are such “no brainers.”

How can a company be so “cutting edge” on one hand and anchored in the Middle Ages on the other?

Do they have an “HR” department at Google?  I assume they do.  If so, what have they been doing?  Were they all too busy bouncing around on their rubber exercise balls?

Google CEO, Sundar Pichai, said he and management support the protest and are listening to staff.

Isn’t that nice?!

He also said, “We let ‘Googlers’ know that we are aware of the activities planned for Thursday and that employees will have the support they need if they wish to participate.”

Isn’t that nice again?!

“Employees have raised constructive ideas for how we can improve our policies and our processes going forward.  We are taking in all their feedback so we can turn these ideas into action.”

Here are some of their constructive ideas (leaked exclusively to MrEricksonRules.com) to improve the company’s policies:

“Executives should be required to at least throw a blanket on top of their desk before throwing employees on them and having their way with them.”

“Executives should be required to follow through with promised increases in pay and/or promotions after “services” have been officially rendered.”

“Executives should be required to leave their office door unlocked before choosing to chase their secretaries around the office, in an effort to demonstrate fairness, and the potential opportunity for the secretary to escape.”

These “constructive ideas” all seem quite reasonable, don’t they?

Sundar Pichai and Larry Page, the CEO of Google’s parent company Alphabet, both apologized to staff last week for the company’s record on sexual misconduct.  Pichai reinforced that apology in an email to staff this week.

Isn’t it nice to know that Sundar and Larry offered their sincerest apologies?

They’re sorry alright.  Sorry they got caught!

The seriousness of these accusations coupled with mass employee walkouts would seem to call for more than just apologies!

Perhaps Sundar and/or Larry need to be shown the door, along with a few of their friends!

Perhaps Google executives should worry about their own behavior before worrying about manipulating search results in order to mute conservative viewpoints and push liberal leaning results!

Perhaps Google executives should stop claiming to know what’s best for the rest of us when they can’t even keep their pants on at work!

The unabashed hypocrisy demonstrated by liberal “know-it-alls” never ceases to amaze me.

I’m sure we won’t have to wait too long for our next installment of “As the World Googles.”

Stay tuned.

Thanks to Jake Kanter, of Business Insider, for contributing to this article.

 

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Thank you, MrEricksonRules.